For the Love of Self-Protection or the Love of Others

BP49

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When I was a teenager, I remember watching Star Trek every afternoon when I came home from school. I am talking about the original series here, not the many iterations of the science fiction story that have followed over the years.

In my mind I can still hear the opening music and the lyrics: Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission, to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations. To boldly go where no man has gone before.

One of the dangers of space exploration in the 23rd century, of course, was enemy spaceships. Occasionally, as the Enterprise was cruising through space, a Romulan warship would remove its cloaking devise and appear out of nowhere to attack the space federation ship. Soon, it would begin firing its torpedoes at Captain Kirk and his crew. What were they to do?

Fortunately, the Enterprise was equipped with shields that, if raised, would deflect enemy fire and so protect the hull of the spacecraft. I might be conflating several different generations of Star Trek series here, but if I remember correctly, these deflector shields were like a force field that surrounded the Enterprise with layers of energetic distortion composed of gravitons.

These shields protected every part of the starship: forward, starboard, port, aft, dorsal and ventral as needed. They deflected both matter and highly concentrated weaponized energy intended to penetrate the hull of the Enterprise during an attack. When the shields were up, damage to the ship usually was minimal. There were a few exceptions, of course.

During battle, Captain Kirk would receive updates (often from Scotty in the engine room) concerning the integrity of the shields. They might be ‘holding’, ‘buckling’, or, worst of all, ‘failing’ before the enemy attack.

If my recollection is accurate—please do not quote me on this point—I believe that if massive energy from the dilithium crystals aboard the Enterprise was being devoted to the shields to protect it from enemy firepower, less energy was available for the other functions of the starship. If most of the energy was devoted to the defense of the ship, i.e., the shields, there was less power available for weapons or for the engines, preventing the ship from performing normal functions like jumping to warp speed.

The application from this information about the Star Trek Enterprise is to be careful how much energy you devote to the protection of your hull (heart).

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Yes, humans have shields as well.

To protect ourselves.

Some of this protection is necessary and justified as when someone comes against us to harm us physically, verbally, emotionally, or spiritually. In God’s word we find plenty of references to shields and armor and protection.

Romans 13 says, So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light. Ephesians 6 commands us to Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand up against the schemes of the devil and to take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day.

In the Psalms, David often refers to God as his shield, strength, stronghold, shelter, rock, tower, fortress– even his hiding place.

Clearly, then, scripture affirms that the people of God need protection against Satan and even against the works of darkness within their own hearts. Elsewhere, David describes how he needs protection against his physical enemies who seek to destroy him. In short, to protect oneself is wise. Boundaries and shields and armor are an essential part of the believer’s battle-rattle.

Sometimes, however, self-protection is unnecessary and even harmful. As DTFL has mentioned before, humans can mistake hurt for harm, accidental act for premeditated attack, and protect themselves from the slightest perceived offense—even when the other person intends no harm.

If our deflector shields are raised too often or with too much intensity, we ward off even good things in our lives. If our shields are engaged without legitimate cause, we will spend so much attention and energy on protecting ourselves that, like the Enterprise, there is little left for other functions.

Like love.

It reminds me of the comment someone made about marriage, namely, that you can be right, or you can be married. In this context, I would like to proffer that you can (over) self-protect, or you can love. If we are wounded so easily by a look, a word, a tone of voice, even by a lack of attention, we will spend most of our lives hurt, offended, and feeling rejected. Defensiveness will be our primary coping skill.

How can we direct any energy from the dilithium crystals in our hearts to loving others when so much is devoted to the shields that protect us?

The answer is, we will not be able to do so. We will have to choose between guarding our hearts too much and being vulnerable enough to love others.

What internal reasons prompt us to over-protect our own hearts? Past harm from others, our own sin, shame, maybe a fear of being too needy or possibly because we have projected our own anger into others and then fear the intensity of their anger. Some people overprotect because no one else has ever protected them, so they believe that they must do it for themselves.

Do not forget, the beliefs and coping skills you learn as a child must be identified and intentionally deconstructed in adulthood. To ignore them is to maintain them on some level within your soul.

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The question here is if you tend to be a defensive person. Are you quick to perceive slights from others and then raise your shields or launch a counterattack? Do people experience you as prickly? Do you find yourself cutting people out of your life, giving them the silent treatment, or simply allowing yourself to drift away from anybody who hurts/harms you?

If you are too well or too often defended, it could be that you are either overperceiving harm from others or, when you are legitimately hurt, you react in ways that are terminal instead of responding in a manner that is truthful and relational.

Do you remember one of the primary objectives of DTFL? Always move toward people (when it is safe, of course) so you do not end up moving against them or away from them.

If you tend to be a defensive person for whatever reason (e.g., fear of others or fear that no one else will defend you), run to Jesus. He is your protector, your defense attorney, the parent who never forgets you, the One who came not to bring condemnation but to deliver you from it.

Those who walk closely with Jesus and practice His presence the most frequently are the children of God who are most freed from thinking about defending themselves and therefore most available to love others. Once again, we encounter the truth that Jesus is not only of value to you in the next world. He is also of infinite value to you in this world because He empowers you to love God and to love others as you love yourself.

Do you need any other protection beyond these words to you from God: Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows my name. When he calls to me, I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will rescue him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation ~ Psalm 91:14-16

God will deliver, protect, answer, rescue, honor, satisfy and save us. Meditate on these truths about His actions toward our hearts. Knowing that the Creator of the universe will do all these things for you will free you up from focusing on your sin, guilt, shame, fear, future or even your death. Rehearse these truths from Psalm 91 and you will no longer need to defend yourself or fear the opinion of others. The opinion of only one person will matter to you.

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Jesus will become the rock you stand on that towers far above every fear and all threats to your personhood. So, stop endlessly defending yourself. Instead, seek Him, worship Him and love others.

Remember, then, put up your deflector shields if danger comes toward you but even on these occasions remember that Jesus says He will walk with you in the valley of the shadow of death and comfort you in the darkest places.

Yes, set boundaries to protect yourself but do not engage deflector shields to the point that they over-protect your heart. If you perceive harm when it is not actually present or protect yourself beyond reason, you will not only defend your own heart against love but will have few supplies left to love God and others. You will be too consumed by self-focus.

Be very careful, then, how you defend your heart.

Better yet, ask Jesus to defend your heart. When He is your Protector and Defender, the power emanating from the dilithium crystals in your heart can be devoted to empathy, forgiveness, and a covenantal love that does not obsess about fairness but about serving the other person even if they wrong you.

So, be like Jesus who said about His executioners, Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. Talk about the ability to love instead of defending Himself!

Be wise about defending yourself and always remember that He will be your shield.

You will not need to fight in this battle. Stand firm, hold your position, and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf . . . Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed. Tomorrow go out against them, and the Lord will be with you ~ 2 Chronicles 20:17

As the mountains surround Jerusalem, so the Lord surrounds His people, from this time forth and forevermore ~ Psalm 125:1,2

Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense ~ Proverbs 19:11